A while ago, when I first started blogging I was very conscious about what I wanted to write and how I write it. I only had one reader back then but whenever I blogged, I felt like I was talking to the entire world. Having been so used to feeling the power of the red pen, I couldn't imagine myself being in my students' shoes - writing instead of marking. Because of that, I had a lot of anxieties and dilemmas. What if I sound pathetic? What if they criticize my grammar? What if I sound silly? What if my boss reads this? What if I get negative feedbacks? There were so many what ifs.
After some time, it dawned to me that nobody gives a hoot what I talk about in my site. I mean, it's not like I'm a celebrity or a politician. So I stopped being perasan, and just let myself go with every post, subtly at first. After a series of self-indulgent entries, I felt really good and I slowly became addicted to the feeling. I wanted to feel good over and over again. I can't explain why, but there's a sense of accomplishment whenever I click the PUBLISH POST button. To me, it's extremely satisfying and almost as good as s.. No, that's not right. Let me think of something else. It's almost as good as...shopping! That's right.
Come to think of it, shopping and blogging have a lot in common. Like shopping, blogging is done when I'm feeling happy, excited, bored or frustrated. Sometimes it is a spur-of-the-moment kind of thing and sometimes it is deliberated. Point is, blogging is fun. I'm sure most of you can relate to this right?
Well, for those who can't, I'd like to tell you the reasons why I blog.
Blogging is bonding
Blogging is not always about monologing aimlessly. It is also about bonding and socializing. The activity allows the kind of dialogue that might otherwise be inappropriate to initiate in normal situations. I don't go to the office talking about my frustration with eye bags or my challenges in gym class. I talk about those petty stuff here, in the blogsphere, where any kind of topic is good topic. Because of the freedom in blogging, a variety of posts on a common topic (like undereye wrinkle?) across multiple blogs can be connected into a common thread. Bloggers can then comment on each other's posts, share experiences and give advice. Isn't this a wonderful way of socializing?
Blogging is therapeutic
After a crappy day, I get to let go of all my personal frustrations and anxieties by putting them on paper. I mean, spreadsheet. I get to start afresh with every new entry and this provides me with a very therapeutic session. It certainly clears the brain and is a much cheaper alternative to seeing a shrink. Well, not that I need one btw!
Blogging chronicles life
I used to have a diary when I was younger and I loved writing about my thoughts on paper. But like Chelsea Handler said, we shouldn't be stuck in the 90s. Blogging equals a diary in the new millenium. So, instead of having a physical diary, I have this blog to chronicle my life and archive my thoughts. I love rereading my old posts just to laugh at myself. Sometimes, I also cringe and say "Ewww!!! why the heck did I say that?" But I guess, that realization means that I have matured and evolved right?
I am not asking everyone to start blogging. I'm simply making a point. A friend of mine who found out about this blog annoyed me when she remarked that I have nothing else better to do than blog. She said she'd rather concentrate on her research than write aimlessly. She also said "wah ko ada masa lagi for all this nitty gritty stuff?". The last comment irritated me the most.
So, my message to that friend is, there's more to life than just research. I'm sure you know this cos you seem to be spending a lot of time on Facebook; making comments, checking updates, uploading photos etc. If you have time for Facebook, why can't I have time for blogging? Like they say, one man's junk is another man's treasure.